For fun: How to pick your MBA school (guest post)
This is a guest post. The author requested to remain anonymous, for reasons that shall shortly become clear.
When it comes time to choose which business school to go for, the most important factor to consider – in fact, the only thing to consider – is of course the quality of the local girls. Not the girls in the MBA itself – the time will certainly come when you slobber over those – but the girls in the town you live in. Those are the girls that you will most likely start dating, once the raving workload madness of the first terms is done with you. And unlike your female classmates, they won’t have seen you stumbling into class unshaven and be regularly browbeated by evil professors for your unending stupidity. The local girls are the ones you might stand a chance of impressing, provided you don’t open your mouth too often.
Let’s take Europe as an example. A quick look at the top-ranked schools there will give you four options – four top-tier places to take your MBA. Those are London Business School, IMD, INSEAD and IESE. So: considerations on those.
London Business School? The locals: pale overweight Cockney-speaking monsters in miniskirts. And that’s just the guys. On the plus side, they’re constantly drunk. But still. It’s London. Rain, anyone? Ok, cucumber sandwich, then?
IMD in Switzerland, then? Well, ask yourself – do you like Swiss people? Science is still trying to figure out who exactly does. They’re procreating somehow, so somebody must not fall asleep while talking to them.
Okay, INSEAD in France, then? Clear potential. French women are insane, and so share a lot with the female race in general, but they have a certain inimitable style – a certain je ne sais quoi, perhaps, a certain laissez-faire attitude, a certain voulez-vous coucher avec moi reputation. Only bummer is, INSEAD’s campus is located quite some distance from Paris, in a place called Fontainebleau which nobody knows how to pronounce, much less find on a map. But still, clearly a viable proposition.
And finally, IESE in Barcelona? Ahh, now there we’re talking. Nobody ever heard of the school, of course – what the hell kind of name is IESE anyway? – but just about everybody heard of the luscious, fiery, darkhaired beauties that populate Spain. Less boring than the Swiss, less mentally unbalanced than the French, less fat/boisterous/drunk/miniskirt-wearing than the British. Spot on.
Other factors to consider
There are no other factors to consider.
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